Comfort.....at what cost?

Lately I notice how much I’m being tested on my efforts to slow down. It’s funny how this works-it seems that when I make a decision the universe throws me a challenge, testing my dedication to the changes that are under way.

Or.....perhaps the universe is always throwing out the challenges, but my busyness keeps me distracted from seeing them. Or second-zies on perhaps, I’m aware that it’s constantly happening, but it’s just easier to keep doing things the way I always do them. Change is uncomfortable, and I am uncomfortable with being uncomfortable!

How long will I continue paying the price for a moment of comfort?

Checking In

Just thought I’d check in with a post, updating you on my efforts to slow down. Well actually, let’s get honest here. I’m bored out of my mind! My efforts to slow down have been so successful, I have been left with too much time on my hands! As tempting as it has been to fill in the blanks, I know that following though with my commitment is much too important.

So, you want to know what I’m doing with all this free time. Well…….

For starters I have been enjoying the streak of good weather we’ve been having. I’m taking daily walks with my dog Abby. She gets to burn off some energy from being stuck in the house and I get to burn some energy from being stuck in my head, win-win!

I have also been filling in the blanks with writing. About a year ago I found it to be something I really enjoyed. Not only is it a much needed creative outlet, but it also gives me the opportunity to empty some of the brain!

Well, it’s time for me to get moving here before I spoil myself silly with all this “me” time (or possible drive myself bonkers)! Could it be possible that I’m actually looking forward to some chores around the house………….Naaaaa!

Makin' a list...

Now if there’s one thing I know how to do, it’s make me a good list. I have a list for just about everything and anything. From the typical lists like the break-down of paying bills, what to buy at the grocery store, to who needs to be where and at what time. Or maybe it’s a list of goals, writing the pros and cons of something, or a list of the changes I’d like to see done with the house (the honey-do list). And ohhh, not to forget one of my favorites soon to come, making a list of what I’d love to plant in my flowerbeds this spring. So with this being said, it only seems reasonable that if I am going to figure out how to slow down, I’d first start with a list of what is important to me. Not only making a new one, but also taking into consideration some of my old ones.

Starting with the obvious (for me):

1. My list was old. I hadn’t taken the time to re-evaluate why the priority was set in the first place. For example, my husband and I chose to work schedules opposite each other so one of us would always be home with the babies. Well, the babies are now 9 and 11 and we are still working the same schedule. When Rob and the kids are home, I’m working. This is one of the things I’ll be taking a closer look at.

2. The list sounded good. I make lists that sure do sound good, and they are.….....on paper! But in order for us to achieve them there is a lot of suffering that takes place. They are not always realistic. Now this would be the type of list that pertains to money. Once I make a decision, we all gonna pay the price! I’m setting financial goals that are too big, leaving us no room, or money, for enjoyment.

3. Making cuts. This is where it starts to get challenging. How do I make cuts when most of what I am doing I enjoy doing, as well as need to do? I once read a quote, “say no to the good so you can say yes to the great” and boy do I feel like there are a lot of good things going on around me. I guess this would be a good time to get picky!

For the most part, this starts to cover some of the most important area's of my life. Family is number one, that’s all there is to it. My beliefs around money had to be in there, because I have a good deal of stress is related to it. And then, just how valuable is my time? I actually had some great opportunities to say "no" this week, and wouldn't ya know it, the world didn't come to an end!

Thanks for reading!

Breathe

Lately I have been noticing that I am overwhelmed. It’s like I catch myself not breathing and I don’t even realize that my body is under stress, when I’m really not doing much of anything! Well, I am doing something, but not anything that I would expect to make me feel this way. I notice it most when I am doing things like packing lunches, unloading the dishwasher, getting ready for work, needing to exercise, folding laundry, helping the kids get ready for school……..grrrr, cooking and cleaning, wiping the dogs paws, or filling my gas tank (when I get gas I always make of point of letting my husband know, truly expecting him to say “Wow Julie, great job, I am sooo proud of you. I know that putting gas in your car is such a chore, why don’t you let me take care of that for now on!") Well, truth be told, my husband does more on that list than I do. This is probably one of those times I should have kept quite!

Now this list that I just blurted out kind of sounds like a pity party, and maybe it is…..just a little. But hey, this is why I am doing this blog, to get the junk out. But also there is a point I am trying to get to, and that point is……I AM TOO BUSY! Most my days are scheduled from start to finish. In addition to my part time job as a hairdresser, I also have a full time job just keeping busy! For years I have been saying that this is going to change, but the only thing that has changed is that I have taken on even more without letting anything go!

So I am thinking that now is the time to slow down. I am out of balance and want my actions to line up with what I say my priorities are…...I think. Actually, my priorities might need a little tweaking as well. I am not sure how this will work, but I will start with the obvious…….not doing it the way I have in the past! This is going to take creativity and commitment. The reality is that most of the things on my list will not go away and are necessary. Things I actually enjoy, but could do differently. The other reality is, slowing down doesn’t only refer to my “activities” because most of my busyness takes place in my head. And being the big picture person that I am, I do struggle with taking first steps (shoot, there’s another one of my commitments for this year).

Baby step: making a list of what is most important for me and my family.